Schlagwort: Urlaub

Nach dem Urlaub ist vor dem Urlaub

According to a survey 45 % of Germans find it difficult to return to the workplace after their holiday. Looking at our neighbours the numbers are not much different. Who would have thought that the Italians (38%), the Spanish (38 %) and the French (41%) also suffer at the end of their holiday? The anticipation of the next holiday seems to most people to be a tried and tested means to dispel these cloudy thoughts – on average 27 % of all respondents from all 15 countries surveyed dream of the next one after the end of a trip.

Seven signs that you should go on holiday:

  1. You think a “half day” means leaving at 5pm.
  2. You find that you need PowerPoint to explain what you do for a living.
  3. You eat out of a vending machine and at the most expensive restaurant in town within the same week.
  4. You think that “progressing an action plan” and “calendarizing a project” are acceptable English expressions.
  5. You know the people at the airport better than you know your neighbours.
  6. You ask your friends to “think outside the box” when making Friday-night plans.
  7. On Saturdays you get all excited because you can wear jeans and a T-shirt to work.

Urlaubswitze

Herr Müller macht Urlaub in Schottland. Er fragt einen Einheimischen: „Was halten Sie eigentlich von Schottenwitzen?“ „Damit sollte man sehr, sehr sparsam umgehen!“

 

Ein Urlauber ruft in einem Kurhotel an, um sich zu erkundigen, wie es am besten zu finden sei. „Es ist nur einen Steinwurf vom Strand entfernt,“ erklärt ihm der Direktor. „Und wie kann ich es erkennen?“ „Ganz einfach, es ist das Haus mit den zerbrochenen Fensterscheiben!“

 

Bauer Moser war in Rom. Nach seiner Rückkehr wird er gefragt, wie ihm denn die Sixtinische Kapelle gefallen habe. Darauf Bauer Moser: „Die habe ich nicht gehört- muss wohl auf Tournee gewesen sein.“

 

Jokes from the UK

 

I“ve just got back from holiday. The hotel we stopped at was absolutely fantastic. The towels were so soft and fluffy, I could hardly close my suitcase.

 

Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool. „You’re not allowed to pee in the pool!“,  yells the lifeguard. „But everyone pees in the pool“, said Little Johnny. „Maybe, “said the lifeguard, „but not from the diving board! “

 

Three holidaymakers are debating about which of their languages is the most
pleasing to the ear.
The Spaniard says, “Consider the word for ‘butterfly’. In Spanish,
this is Mariposa, a beautiful sounding word.”
The French guy says, “True, but Papillon is even more beautiful”.
“What’s wrong with Schmetterling?”, says the German….